Welcome to the second edition of the Ohio Sports Recap. While this week won’t feature an update on the Simpson’s, Buckeye Superbowl records, or OSU speakers, I can promise a shout out to Jeff “I really am best friends with Terrell Owens” Garcia.
And recap #2 begins……now:
****Well, as you guessed it, the big news is the release of another Cleveland QB who was…umm..hanging out with a Playmate. Jeffy Garcia was told he wasn’t in the Browns future plans and to pack his bags (but hopefully leave the girl). On the Playmate topic, I want to give props to Couch…you managed to drag along the hot Kosar to Green Bay, but hopefully Garcia won't be as lucky. Something tells me he won't. So Garcia had a 4 year, $25 million contract, but since this is the NFL and contracts mean nothing...well, he is gone. Thankyou all you lawyers out there for writing clauses that basically make a contract as important as security guards at a Dead Show. So Garcia is gone and now the question remains…what the heck are we gonna do with Kelly Holcomb and Luke McCowen as our QB’s? Romeo needs to make another move fast before we get stuck with Couch again…no comment on that one. BUT..Let me the first to say “Hello Carmella”..giggidy.
yea..real sad to see you go Mr. Garcia
****In Cavs news, the big man, Z, is headin to Denver. I mean he really is the second best center in the East - actually, can you even name 5 centers in the Eastern Conference? So Z is on his way to the All-Star game and also making some waves because at the end of this year his contract is up. Actually, him making the All-Star team was probably the worst thing that could happen as his agent mentioned he should be paid like one of the best centers in the league. Here is the situation: The Cavs should have a little over $20 million in cap room at year’s end, but the team needs to grow. Michael “1999 Final Four” Redd is very interested in heading home to Ohio to play with the renovated Cavs. But in order to pay both Z and Redd, Z might have to take a pay cut. Willthat happen…boy I don’t know. Obviously, there are other scenarios, but when it comes down to it – it’s all about how greedy Z wants to be.
****In some crazy random news, Professional Bowling made its way back to its former headquarters of LeAkron, OH. This was the first time since 1994 a professional bowling tournament was held in LeAkron. Unlike tournaments 10 years ago, this time the bowling alley had decorations everywhere and a huge illuminating ESPiN scoreboard (Isn’t it amazing the sports ESPiN has resorted to covering since they realized they couldn’t just run 24 hours of Sportscenter a day). Anyways, check out this blurb from the Akron paper:
Fans got a chance to see 43-year-old PBA Hall of Famer and Venezuelan native Amleto Monacelli win for the first time since 1997. Monacelli has become an ambassador for the game.
Even though he's middle-aged, he's one of the hippest bowlers on tour. Yeah, that's right, a hip bowler -- sporting loop earrings in each ear. Monacelli is like the Omar Vizquel of the PBA.
All this bowling talk, I can’t help but think of the greatest bowling team ever assembled – The Dude, Donnie, and Walter.
****In quite possibly the best news of the week, Carlos Boozer is officially on his way to having worse stats than Gooden as a Cavalier. Boozer was recently named by SI.com as the “Whose Down” player in the NBA (smiling big time). Boozer has even found his way from extreme shadeball to the Jazz bench in the 4th quarter of some recent games. "Some nights he's acted like he didn't care that much," owner Larry Miller told the Deseret News. Well, all I can really say is a big phat Nelson “Ha Ha.”
****Also, it has been confirmed no Indians were mentioned of steroid use in a recent book by Mr. Fake Tan himself.
Adios..
P.S. Wait a sec..did I not mention LeBron at all? Whew..i just did, but if you need more check out this puppy.
2 comments:
Mr. LeBlog-
Once again, another great recap. Let me add a few things:
Heather Kozar, playmate girlfriend of Tim "why did the Browns pick me before Donovan McNabb" Couch is from LeAkron. Yes, playmates of the year and NBA legends come from akron. And the lawyers don't make the contracts worth nothing; the players collectively bargained with the owners to allow non-guarenteed contracts. That is why the signing bonus is so key (you don't get that $$ in other sports upfront like that).
Z will not get paid as much as he wants. No one in the league is going to pay a 30+ Center with a history of injuries top dollar. The contract also depends on the new collective bargaining agreement and the restructuring the free-agent scheme. The Cavs can go over the cap to sign their own player by exercising their "Bird" rights.
I caught snipets of the bowling this weekend (hey, I was watching ESPN and they mentioned LeAkron as soon as it cut away to bowling. I had to check out the old haunts). The guy who won is apparently the third most popular athlete in Venezuela (wow, that is an exciting country. He wouldn't be the third most popular athlete living in Bath, Ohio). I take issue with the the greatest bowling squad ever though- I think any squad must include "the Legend."
I have nothing but glee for Carlos Loozer's pathetic performance in Utah. I hope he enjoys all the Mormons.
No Indians used Steroids. That is great. We may like to cork our bats (especially Mr. LeBlog and Albert Belle), but we use no chemical enhancers.
I would just like to add that Z is coming off a $70 million contract and he's indicated he's willing to work with the Cavs. The question will not be how greedy he wants to be, but how much pressure the player's assoiciation will put on him to take top dollar (Remember what happened a guy named Jim Thome? No hometown discounts, even for nice guys, if the player's association has a say.).
Furthermore, I believe that Juan Gonzalez is an Indian and he was definitely named in Idiot's...oops... I mean Jose's book. I don't doubt that Juan Gone was taking the Juice (and not Lebron's brand) back in Texas.
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